


Stay

by ERAC12



Series: Coldflash and Coldflashwave fics that keep me going and writing [13]
Category: DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV), The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending, Barry is crazy (Is he?), Canon compliant with season 1 and 2 of Legends of tomorrow, ColdFlash Big Bang 2020, Eddie Thawne Lives, Except for the CaptainCanary, Ghosts (Not really), M/M, Metahuman Leonard Snart, Mini Bang, Resurrected Len, Season 4 divergence, WestThawne wedding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-30
Updated: 2020-11-30
Packaged: 2021-03-09 17:54:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,867
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27790327
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ERAC12/pseuds/ERAC12
Summary: When Barry returned from the speedforce, he was broken by all the memories the speedforce gave him, memories of a live he didn’t have (did he?) and the different timelines and lives he could have had. But with the help of his family and friend, he had recuperated almost all his mental health with the little exception of one small detail; he can see his secret dead boyfriend, Leonard Snart, and he is following him everywhere. Now, he has to hide it to not ruin his best friend’s wedding. But Len is not giving him an easy time as he swears that he isn’t a hallucination and he needs his help. What the heck?
Relationships: Barry Allen/Leonard Snart, Eddie Thawne/Iris West, Mentioned Cisco Ramon/Harrison "Harry" Wells
Series: Coldflash and Coldflashwave fics that keep me going and writing [13]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/997836
Kudos: 32
Collections: Coldflash Bang 2020





	1. Chapter 1

Barry have never wondered how many cake’s flavours could possibly existed until the day he found himself eaten more than 25 different cakes in less than an hour. The reason behind his current situation was Eddie who had asked him the favour to help him choosing a cake for his and Iris’s wedding as she was busy covering an unexpected interview with the mayor and she couldn’t be there in flesh. Barry couldn’t say not to the blonde for two reason: the first one, he was the best man and the second one, he felt guilty for all the chaos and pain he provoked in his loved ones when he went into the speedforce and returned as a madman.

When he was rescued of his prison for Cisco, he couldn’t tell apart between reality and fiction as well past, present and future events. He wouldn’t return to his senses if his family hadn’t helped him, dedicating time and a lot of effort, and never given up hope. So, Barry was lucky, he knew it, and he was happy to be helpful. Even if he was starting to get bored of cake.

"I know you have a super-metabolism." Len said to him. "But it cannot be healthy to eat that much cake" Barry ignored him and took a spoon of the coconut cake the woman offered he and Eddie.

"I don’t like it."The blond said to the metahuman." Too tropical for a winter wedding" He commented.

"Maybe we should stay with the warm flavours." Barry replied. "The ones which would taste better with coffee or red wine" Len nodded before he started to walk around the bakery, looking at the different cake’s models with not so much interest.

"Chocolate?" Eddie asked tired. "The red velvet seemed elegant and everybody loves chocolate" He explained.

:All the capes?" The attended questioned at the same time she took notes. "Or would you prefer mixed flavours?" She offered with a kind smile.

"It would be better if you choose only one." Len said dull. "If the detective tried to select another one, we will be stuck here all day." He sassed.

"Maybe you should mix chocolate and vanilla in different capes." Barry suggested, ignoring Len mocking. "To the ones who cannot or don’t like chocolate" He added.

"That’s an excellent option!" The attended congratulated flirty to the brunet, putting his perfect manicured hand in his shoulder. Len looked murderly to the woman and Barry noticed it so, uncomfortable, he moved away.

"Good idea!" Eddie exclaimed happy to find a solution to his problem and hugged his soon to be brother in law. They would be out of this store soon…

"What about the icing?" The woman asked and the two of them looked at each other tired. _They weren’t going anywhere soon._

When they finished their chore, the blond drove Barry to his flat before leaving to see his fiancée and inform everything to her. The woman would be pleased with their elections and more relaxed as the final touches of their wedding were getting in their place. The brunet was happy to help his friends and ensure their happy end.

As soon as he closed the door, a sensation of gloom fell over him. He was used to it. The feeling of coldness, loneliness and sorrow felt his heart. _Why I am still here?_ He thought as he walked towards his bedroom. _What I am still pretending to live?_ He wondered as he through himself into his bed, exhausted and miserable. Sometimes, having to live was so difficult.

"You should go to Star Labs, _Scarlet"_ Len told him from the door. The man looked sad and angry. "What are you doing here?" He reproached as he walked into the room. "You shouldn’t be alone."

'Shut up" The brunet asked from his place, drowning his face into the bed and cover his ears with his hands. "Just shut up, Len." He pledged as tears started to fell down his eyes and watered the sheets. "You’re not here" He cried with desperation.

Len froze in the spot when he listened the last words. He closed his eyes to hide his own pain. He didn’t try to speak or said anything more. It was useless. They had discussed it day after day and Barry would not listen to Len’s words.

He thought Len was an apparition or an hallucination. The punishment the speedforce brought into him when Ramon took him out of it. Perhaps, he even thought of him as a demon from hell who mission was to torment him for eternity. He wasn´t it. He was alive, kind of.

When he woke up after his “death”, he found himself in the speedforce. He wasn’t longer a simple human as his soul merged with time itself as a result of his heroic actions. When he recovered the conscious, the force that gave Barry the speed guided him into the understanding of his new condition. It had rescued him after the explosion of the Oculus.

He took a long time to adapt to his new nature. That wasn’t so bad because he had the eternity to do it. The laws of physics didn’t apply to him anymore and he wasn’t limited by concepts like space or time. He was learning his new abilities and getting himself used to his new condition when Barry entered into the speedforce willingly.

At first, Len was furious with he and the speedforce. He was angry with the second one because it was robbing the love of his life the opportunity of living. Even if he could understand that it was necessary to avoid chaos in different realities.

Although he was madder with Barry. It broke his heart how easy was for him to sacrifice his live. But all rage was gone when the man hugged him with so much force and start to cry. Having him in his arms again, after thinking he wouldn’t have the chance of doing it again, Snart could just returned the hug and hide his face in his hair.

Moreover, Len, as the selfish creature he had always been, indulged himself and enjoyed the new opportunity the universe had given to them. Both of them were aware of how lucky they were. They were together at least.

No expectations. No heroes. No villains. Just Barry and Len together. They were happy. They built a life together out of time and reality. It was impossible to explained how much time had been passed, minutes or years, but they didn’t care. The speedster let them be as free and happy as they could.

Then Ramon intervened and messed up with Barry’s mind. It would be so bad if they had been prepared but Ramon’s actions were perceived as a violation for the speedforce and it tried to protect Barry’s making him forget his experience inside. For that reason, Barry’s brain was confused and couldn’t focus in this plane of existence.

Len had had to learn how to move around different planes to be able to jump over this one. But, as in his current situation, he couldn’t do it at its totally. Now, he got trapped between dimensions and the only person who could perceive him was Barry.

He had tried to talk to him and let him know that he needed his help but he didn’t listen to him. He didn’t remember a lot of his time inside the speedforce and he really thought he was a ghost. So, Len had just started to follow Barry and kept him company.

Initially, he was stressed with how slow Barry was recovering for the trauma of losing himself. Len supposed it wasn’t easy being back on the “land of the living” and it was more difficult when you think you are being followed by your “dead” lover. But, at this time, almost six months after returning, it was expected him to be a little bit better but he wasn’t getting there.

In the contrary, Barry was getting worst. He wasn’t interested in anything as if the world wasn’t as bright and beautiful as it used to be. He didn’t know it but he was yearning for the life he believed was a dream; the life they shared together in thee speed force.

As a civilian, he worked all day, trying to lost himself in it, at the same time he tried to keep himself busy as an excuse to not have to spend time with his family and friends. It was painful to him to see them happy when he could feel it too, no matter how much he tried. Len had seen him how he acted when he was with them; he would pretend he was fine, a smile in his face, but, as soon as he was alone, he would let himself down.

As a superhero, he was still acted as the beloved Flash. Although, his eyes and smile had lost the warmness it used to have and the ex-criminal couldn’t blame for it. His beautiful Barry had seen enough. He had suffered more than he should in ten life times. He was tired. But he still woke up and rase for the most vulnerable ones.

Len let out a sigh and walked towards Barry. When he stood next to the young one, the criminal craved for be able of touching him and comforting him. He stayed there, looking over his boyfriend, as he fell asleep slowly. The legend watched with sad eyes how Barry turned over, revealing his beautiful face, and he felt his heart broke when he saw the tears in the other’s check.

The man explored his beloved body. Barry was skinner than he could see his bones and the dark circles under his eyes were noticeable. Even with the speedforce tried to keep his body healthy, it was evident how little the other took care of himself and how ill he was. Tears dropped for Len’s eyes and it disappeared in the nothingness as a reminder that he didn’t belong there…

It was obvious, that his presence was dangerous for his lover. It hurt him more than help him. Perhaps, the speedster would get better if he was not in the picture; he would move on and find someone else. After all, following the hero here was just a selfish act, Len couldn’t let him go, but it had to stop.

He closed his eyes and started to concentrated all his energy and powers. The ex-criminal wanted to reconnected with the speedforce. He would get his physical body or he would go inside it again. It didn’t matter. The only thing he wanted to do was to liberated Barry for his ghostly presence

_Barry found himself in the park that he used to play with Iris and Joe when he was a teenager. The place was deserted. No kids, no birds, no wind. Nothing. He looked around with a scared expression. Did he was trap in the speedforce? He asked himself._

_"Scarlet!" A masculine voice called him from behind. A voice he could recognize easiest that his own. Barry turned around immediately._

_Part of him was afraid of it being a speedforce’s ghost, an imitation of his real boyfriend, because it had used him as a mask before and Len was dead in the real world. But another, little, part of him was hopeful as the voice contained so much emotion to be a reflexion created by the speedforce._

_Len was there, in front of him, with a tense posture and watery eyes. He was wearing a simple black long-sleeved shirt, his dark skinny jeans and boots. No sights of his guns or his parka. It wasn’t Captain Cold or Snart. He was just Len; his Len._

_"I know you don’t think I…" Len started to said before he was interrupted by the speedster. He practically attacked him with a hug, involving his neck with his arms, and kissed him with desperation._

_The kiss was full of passion, love and sorrow. At the same time their lips crashed against the others, tears fell down their faces and melted together. Neither of them cared about it. Len hugged Barry; his hands were dangerously going south._

_When Len’s hands pushed him up, Barry let himself being carried and wrapping his waist with his legs. The speedster felt drunk with Len kisses. The familiar saviour and scent drove him crazy. He thought he would never been exposed to him._

_Unexpectedly, Barry found himself laying over a bed. He was surprised by the change of scenario. They weren’t in the park anymore. They were in the room of Len’s house, the one they shared their first night together. The speedster closed his eyes, frowning, as he tried to connect the points. How it was possible…?_

_"Scarlet" Len murmured at the same time he separated himself of his lover to be able of seeing him into his eyes. "What’s the matter?" He asked worried._

_"This is a dream" Barry said wounded. "You’re dead." Len let a sigh out and he got up. Barry wanted to stop him but he didn’t do it. He just looked from his spot in the bed how the man stood up without saying nothing. "Len…" Barry begged without force._

_"I am not dead, Scarlet" Len said without facing him "But you don’t understand it." The voice of the man broke._

_"What are you saying?" Barry asked as he got up and walked toward his boyfriend._

_"I…" Len responded but he stopped himself when he felt Barry’s arms around himself and his heat against his back "…I have to let you live" He completed as he turned around, without breaking the contact between they. "I will be waiting for you" He promised as he gave him a gentle kiss in the lips. "Be happy…"_

Barry woke up, alone, in his bed, in his apartment. The man was gasping for air as he felt like he was being asphyxiated by an unknow force. His body was cold and sweaty. When he recovered his breath, he sat up with a confused expression in his face. 

His dream was so unusual. It was so vividly. He could swear he and Len was really together. Even after waking up, he could almost taste Len in his mouth after the kisses and smell his aftershower over himself.

He got up, using his speed, and ran into the bathroom. He looked at his reflection with surprise: His mouth was red and puffed. _It wasn’t possible, Was it?_ He asked himself as he touched his lips. He stayed there for almost a minute, mesmerized, when he realised, he was alone.

He looked around all his apartment, trying to find the ghost who had been following him since he recovered his senses after coming back from the speedforce, but it was nowhere to be seen. Barry felt his throat closed and his vision blurred when he couldn’t find his hallucination, or what he had believed to be a product of his imagination until this moment. He let himself fall in his knees, in the middle of the living room, and broke in an angsty cry than sound like a wounded animal.

The speedster couldn’t breathe and his body shook so fast that it was almost imperceptible to the human eyes. His chest hurt so much. He felt like he was dying so slowly. He wished he was. Darkness dominated him and he lost his link with reality.

_His hallucination wasn’t an hallucination. Not really. It was really him. His Len. The love of his life. The one who loved him being just Barry. The one who he loves no matter his past and his mistakes. He had been asking his help. How? Mick said he was dead. Ray told him that he sacrificed to save them. He died as a legend. So, he was a ghost, wasn’t he? But he said he was alive. Trapped. Len had been trapped with him for months. MONTHS… And, now, he was gone…He said it himself…_

"How more time would he be like that?" Iris’ voice interrupted his thoughts. "What is wrong with him?" She asked scared.

"I don’t know." Caitlin answered. "His physical exams are perfect." The scientist explained "I can only assume it something wrong in the mental health."

"Again?" Joe’s voice intervened. "Like when he came back from the speed prison?" Barry’s adopted father sounded worried. "How? Why now?" he questioned.

"I don’t know." Cisco responded exasperated. "How did he act when he was with you, Eddie?"

"He was okay." The blond said. "He was a little tired but he seemed to be okay" He sounds angsty and a little confused.

"Len…" Barry murmured without being able to free himself of the shadow. "Len…where are you?" He asked with a broken and dry voice. The silent was he only answer.

Barry opened his eyes slowly. His body felt heavy and he had difficulties keeping his eyes opened. The worried faces of his family and friends, who were around him, was the first thing he saw. He gave them a weak smile.

"Barry, how are you feeling?" Caitlin asked with sweet voice, the shine in her eyes told him that Frost was listening too.

"Tired" He murmured and she nodded before going out, looking for something to help him.

"You gave us a big scare, Bar–." Eddie told him as he petted his hair. "When Cisco found you in the floor of your apartment…" The blond shuddered.

"What’d happed to you?" Iris asked at the same time she got as close as possible without pushing his fiancé.

"I…I think I had a panic attack" Barry said slowly. "Len…" He frowned his brows. " Len left me!" exclaimed panickily and the monitor’s alarm was activated by his increasing heartbeat.

"Barry!" Cisco intervened with an alarmed expression in him. "I need you to breathe slowly, okay?" Barry nodded and started to do as he was told. "Follow my lead." His friend said, taking his hand between his and breathing loudly.

Barry imitated the rhythm of Cisco’s breaths. His heartbeat started to normalise slowly. Caitlin came again and put something in his IV line. The speedster started to feel sleepy and his body was heavier.

"Cisco" He said. "Len is trapped in the speedforce too." The other man looked at him confused. "Save him!" He pledged as he started to fall in the realm of unconsciousness. "I love him" He confessed faintly.

The next time he was waked up by Joe and Iris’s shouts. The older man was angry meanwhile Iris was confronting her father without backing up. He knew the woman was fierce, like a lioness, and he would hate being the one who made her mad.

"Even if it’s true, we cannot trust in Snart" Joe shouted. "Maybe he is using Barry!"

 _No!_ Barry wanted to scream but the sedatives kept him down. _He will never use me! He promised me after our first date._

"He helped us the last time we saw him." Iris said. "And, although I don’t know if he is really a hero, if Barry loves him and we can save him, I will do it!" She declared firmly. "So, you can go and let Cisco and I work or you can stay and help us." She offered before a series of steps told Barry that the woman had left the place.

"She is right, Joe." Eddie said next to him. The blond had been taking care of his future brother in law and friend. "And you know it."

"I cannot believe Barry and he were involved in…" Joe started to said.

"You heard Barry" Eddie interrupted him with patient voice "He loves him…" Eddie caressed his hair with his fingers "… And I can believe they were together; specially after seeing them interact together."

"Then why did he keep it occult?" Joe asked.

 _Because I knew you would not approve._ Barry answered in his thoughts. _I was afraid you, all of you, would oppose and be angry at me._

"Because he knew you won’t take it well" Eddie responded for him. "Look how you are acting right now." Joe let a sigh out. "He loved you and his family but he also loved Snart; he didn’t want to decided between you and him."

"Am i really that bad?" Joe questioned heavily.

"You are a father" Caitlin said as she entered in the room, the clicks of her heels against the floor was familiar to Barry. "It’s normal you worried to much…" She walked next to Barry, checking his vitals "…but you have to remember your children aren’t kids anymore and they have to take their own decisions." Neither of the two men spoke. "You can go to rest, Eddie" She said to the man. " I will take care of Barry for today" She promised.

"Ok." Eddie answered. "Come on, Joe, I will invite a cup of coffee." Eddie said and the sound of the men’s steps alerted of their exit.

"Everything will be alright, Barry" Caitlin murmured and the tiredness wrapped Barry again. "We will bring Snart back". She said before the speedster fall asleep for a third time.

When Barry woke up, he was able of opening his eyes and look around. Everyone, except Wally who was probably patrolling, was there. He saw Cisco and Caitlin checking something in a monitor, murmuring between them, and Iris sleeping in the lap of an asleep Eddie. Joe was sitting to his right, awake and with a big smile in his face.

"Welcome back" Joe said quietly and Barry smiled– "How are you feeling?" He asked paternally.

"Better" The younger murmured with heaviness in his voice.

"Good" The detective responded and took his hand between his. "Because someone wants to see you…"He added and signed to the door with his head.

Barry looked towards the direction he was indicated and his mouth opened in surprise. Len was there. He was leaning in the mark of the door with a smirk in his face. He was wearing a star lab’s sweatshirt and black pants; it was the first time he saw the other in that type of clothes.

"Len" He said without voice and the smirk in the older man melted into a light smile. His blue eyes shined in adoration as he walked into the room and stopped next to him, in his left side. "Len" Barry repeated as he extended his free hand to touch him.

"I am here" Len said as he gripped the hand with his one hand and caressed his face with the other. "I am really here" He promised and kissed him in the forehead.


	2. Bonus Scene

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We deserve something fluffy and a little bit spicy after all this year. Enjoy it!

Len smiled with exasperation when he saw Caitlin, Barry and Lisa pushing each other playfully at the moment Iris prepared herself to throwing the bouquet of roses. The speedster had been reluctantly dragged by Lisa to participate in the traditional wedding’s rite. She excused her behaviour with a simple: “ _I wanna know if my brother will be the next to marry or I am”._

As if catching a bouquet will determinate if his speedster and he would get marry or not. No. Nothing, not even destiny would decide something for them… After all, Len had already asked Barry to marry him and he had accepted. They hadn’t shared the news because it was Eddie and Iris’ time to shine and enjoy their own ceremony. When the couple return for their honeymoon, they will reveal their engagement.

It had been difficult being back in this plane of existence but Len had adapted; he always did. He still helped the legends in a few missions, after an awkward and sentimental conversation with Mick, but he stayed in Central City the majority of his time. He started a new life as Leonard Winter, Cisco created his new ID, and he started working as a freelancer, checking the security of different enterprises. It was funny and it kept him busy. His free time belonged to Barry.

Sometimes, he still participated in some nefarious plans, he just was in the good guys’ side now. Cisco and Barry helped him get used to his new powers. He could manipulate time and have knowledge of possible futures; as well as he could play with destiny. Useful when your boyfriend is a superhero who fights worldwide threats.

It was still uncertain his condition as metahuman and his limits. One part of him knew that Barry and he will not get older together and they will return to the speedforce one day but he would not worry for it at the moment. So, at the current time, he used his abilities to help team flash at the best of his capacities. Ironic.

A series of screams told Len that the bride had trough the bouquet. He saw as Barry tried to cheat using his powers, discretely, but Caitlin did the same. Both of them slipped and felt on their asses. And, to the surprise of everyone, Wally was the one to get the flowers. The youngest West had hidden himself between the crowd.

At first Barry was kind of disappointed when he didn’t get the bouquet but he recovered his good mood sooner and he even danced with Lisa and Caitlin as they weren’t catfighting a few moments ago. Len was satisfied to just be sitting, nursing his drink and seeing his beloved dance so smoothly. Next to him, Harry Wells, the doppelganger of the deceased scientific, was his only company. The two grumpy men were enjoying the silent and the view of their respective lovers. But that would not last…

"Dance with me." Barry pledged to him with his puppy eyes and adorable smile in his face. It was almost midnight, the recently married had disappeared and everyone was drunk. Even Harry had betrayed him and he was dancing with Ramon.

"Scarlet..." He said serious but the younger man just kept looking at him"... Ok" He accepted and let himself be conduce to the dance floor.

The older man could listen the amused screams of his sister, who was drunk and dancing with Snow, when he stood in the middle of the crowd and started to move at the rhythm of the music. He ignored his little sister’s shenanigans. He was busy; He was stunned by the goofy but sexy man in front of him.

Barry wasn’t the most graceful dancer but he was cute as hell…until he sent that needy look to Len. Then the beautiful man in front of him became a sensual demon who would make the ex-criminal sin. _So, that was the speedster’s hidden agenda…_

"How drunk are you? "Len murmured when his boyfriend smirked and grinded his crotch against his.

"Not much" Barry purred in his ear as he involved him with his arms. His leg moved between his legs and it were dangerously stroking his genitals. "Can’t I desire my fiancé without being drunk, darling?" He asked as he kissed his neck.

"Usually you’re a little shyer, Scarlet" Len answered playfully without stopping his partner. Instead he put his hands on his hips and he brought him as close as it was possible. Leonard knew well how feisty his Barry could be, even if he portraits an innocent facade outside their private rooms, and he wouldn’t deny his own wishes. "But as you wish..." he said before kissing him.

Barry moaned when Len kissing him passionately. The older man’s lips were possessive and dominating. Willingly, Barry opened his mouth and let Len take control meanwhile he moved his waist in little circle against Len’s. Len’s touches only increased the speedster’s libido and made him forget they were on public.

"Oh my god!" Lisa shouted and provoked that Len broke the kissed and separated himself from his lover. "Get a room, Len!" She demanded disgusted.

"With pleasure." The man said shameless with a large smile. Without warning, he carried Barry over his shoulder and walked out of the saloon. The laughs and whistles of his friends followed them.

The wedding’s reception had been celebrated in an hotel and all the guests were staying in the place. Therefore, Len took Barry to the elevator and, when the metal doors closed, he let him down. The speedster giggled a little before launched himself to his arms and kissed him. The brunet’s kisses were welcomed.

When the elevator’s stopped on their floor and opened its doors, Barry cheated and used his powers to get them faster in their room. In a blink, Len found himself in their bed with his lustful fiancé over him. Len grinned when he felt Barry’s lips in his chest at the same time, he unbuttoned his shirt.

The eyes of the legends shone in a bright icy blue. The superhero was not the only with powers and Len planned to use all the means necessaries to make this night one to be remember for the two of them. Despite of having all the eternity, Len had learnt to not waste any day and be thankful for every opportunity he had to enjoy life and his beloved.


End file.
